Dishdasha vs Suit

I had to attend a wedding recently and seeing as how everyone on my father's side is extremely traditional, I was told to wear a Dishdasha or Thobe. For those who do not know, a dishdasha is the name given to the Kuwaiti national dress that comprises of a headpiece and a long-sleeved garment that reaches the person's ankles. Now I don't want to insult Kuwait's tradition or anything but I went to the wedding wearing a suit complete with a blazer, tie, the whole shabang and this act left my father disappointed and embarrassed because it was not a dishdasha. The rest of the people in attendance didn't really seem to mind at all, they just shook my hand and said hello normally regardless of what I was wearing. Of course, I cannot be certain as to their thoughts. They might have been just as distraught as my father or they may have liked it or they may have been indifferent, either way it didn't really seem like that big a deal from my perspective. 

My reason for wearing a suit, however, does not come with the intention of insulting Kuwait as a country or culture it is merely the fact that I am physically not comfortable when wearing a dishdasha. I figured since I don't like them I can compensate by wearing a suit as it is also worn during formal events like weddings and formal family gatherings. I hear that it is actually insulting to wear a suit to a traditional wedding and some families (depending on how traditional they are) may be more insulted than others and may therefore take different actions towards the individual in question. My father's side of the family, however, do not seem to mind at all when they see me at formal gatherings in a suit except of course my father. He is the only one that gives me attitude on the suit and I fail to see why. I should mention that I have a much more open mind than him but even though I don't think the act of wearing a suit should fall anywhere near the "insulting" area. But if the dude is wearing a flamboyantly colored suit that makes them look like a clown then ok I see why it may come across as insulting. I mean no one wants a pink, feathery fucking flamingo of a man at their wedding day looking like he just killed a bunch of parrots and glued their feathers to his skin right? But me I'm a simple guy, I wear shirts and ties appropriately depending on the occasion and actually try not to attract much attention to myself, simply because I am VERY different from my dad's side making conversation impossible from a dramatic lack of mutual interest in a topic. They talk about religion and politics while I enjoy talking about music and movies.

For those who don't know, a dishdasha needs a bit of preparation before it can be worn. Both the garment and headpiece have to be ironed in order for the wearer to look smart. Also the headpiece has very specific ways of being ironed depending on how the wearer would like it to look. Now I have a housekeeper to do this for me but firstly, I don't like giving her extra work with my clothes I mean she already cleans, dries and folds them and I thank her with everything I've got for it. So clearly she has her hands full with the entire house and could do without breaking out the ironing board and preparing my shit. I can learn to do it myself granted, but I would rather not and just wear a suit. Much easier for everyone. Above I mentioned how the headpiece is to be ironed "depending on how the wearer would like it to look". Now with this I honestly have no preference because I really don't care. I just want to get it off me the moment it touches my skin. This, unfortunately, makes things worse for me because even when my housekeeper irons it, I don't know how to specify how to iron it because I don't care what it looks like. Also I don't know how to wear it properly so that it looks good and this of course makes things more difficult because when I am wearing a dishdasha my father gets mad yet again because I don't look smart. So it seems like a dead end either way. 

What I would like you people reading (thank you for reading by the way it really means a lot :)) to take away from this is basically to chill out a bit on dishdashas vs suits. Ok it may be preferable for everyone to wear a dishdasha but if any family has that one person that just prefers suits based on physical comfort then let the guy be. So long as he's not making trouble and his suit is appropriate for the occasion why should you make a big deal and rain on the parade? The way I think of it is this person invited ME to his wedding. He didn't invite a garment or anything he invited a human being who is ME. Now of course this does not mean I can go wearing whatever the fuck I want. No. It means I have to look good to not embarrass anyone attending, especially the bride and groom. This is done out of respect, not tradition. 

Over and fucking over again I am told "You are a Kuwaiti. You must wear a dishdasha. You can't wear a suit." Now this is understandable. Yes representing my country. Wearing the teams colors if you will. But then again I don't need a certain piece of clothing to be on me as a constant reminder of my nationality. I don't need people to know where I'm from and what I stand for because they're just people. They're not my family or my friends and therefore do not matter to me. If someone wants to ask where I'm from they are then more than welcome but if they JUST ask because of what I'm wearing that annoys me to be honest. It's like seeing someone writing with their left hand and asking if they're left handed. No cruel intention or anything just a facepalm moment. But if someone wants to ask where I'm from because they're genuinely interested then they are more than welcome. I don't like when someone is judged on appearance. What they look like or what they wear. It's actually aggravating to hear that some people may not talk to you or acknowledge your existence if you're unlucky enough to be wearing the wrong thing at the wrong occasion. We are not colors or ethnicities or even national clothing, we are people and that's what we should be judged by. Meet the person. Greet them. Have a conversation with them and then choose whether or not you would like to keep talking to them. I think that's a fairer way of dealing with differences. If I'm at a wedding in a suit, instead of coming up to me all heated and pissed yelling about why I'm wearing what I'm wearing why don't you come up to me and ask? If you're genuinely curious just ask the question. Whether or not you like the answer is your problem. I once read a phrase somewhere that made a lot of sense to me.

"It is not our differences that divide us. It is our inability to recognize, accept and celebrate those differences." -Audre Lorde

People always say that our faults, our impurities and our differences are what make us beautiful. I wish some people could open their minds just enough to store a second opinion.

In closing, ladies and gentlemen, today marks the first day of the Holy Month of Ramadan and to whoever is reading I would like to wish you a great month and best of luck with your prayers and fasting. Thank you :)