Dishdasha vs Suit

I had to attend a wedding recently and seeing as how everyone on my father's side is extremely traditional, I was told to wear a Dishdasha or Thobe. For those who do not know, a dishdasha is the name given to the Kuwaiti national dress that comprises of a headpiece and a long-sleeved garment that reaches the person's ankles. Now I don't want to insult Kuwait's tradition or anything but I went to the wedding wearing a suit complete with a blazer, tie, the whole shabang and this act left my father disappointed and embarrassed because it was not a dishdasha. The rest of the people in attendance didn't really seem to mind at all, they just shook my hand and said hello normally regardless of what I was wearing. Of course, I cannot be certain as to their thoughts. They might have been just as distraught as my father or they may have liked it or they may have been indifferent, either way it didn't really seem like that big a deal from my perspective. 

My reason for wearing a suit, however, does not come with the intention of insulting Kuwait as a country or culture it is merely the fact that I am physically not comfortable when wearing a dishdasha. I figured since I don't like them I can compensate by wearing a suit as it is also worn during formal events like weddings and formal family gatherings. I hear that it is actually insulting to wear a suit to a traditional wedding and some families (depending on how traditional they are) may be more insulted than others and may therefore take different actions towards the individual in question. My father's side of the family, however, do not seem to mind at all when they see me at formal gatherings in a suit except of course my father. He is the only one that gives me attitude on the suit and I fail to see why. I should mention that I have a much more open mind than him but even though I don't think the act of wearing a suit should fall anywhere near the "insulting" area. But if the dude is wearing a flamboyantly colored suit that makes them look like a clown then ok I see why it may come across as insulting. I mean no one wants a pink, feathery fucking flamingo of a man at their wedding day looking like he just killed a bunch of parrots and glued their feathers to his skin right? But me I'm a simple guy, I wear shirts and ties appropriately depending on the occasion and actually try not to attract much attention to myself, simply because I am VERY different from my dad's side making conversation impossible from a dramatic lack of mutual interest in a topic. They talk about religion and politics while I enjoy talking about music and movies.

For those who don't know, a dishdasha needs a bit of preparation before it can be worn. Both the garment and headpiece have to be ironed in order for the wearer to look smart. Also the headpiece has very specific ways of being ironed depending on how the wearer would like it to look. Now I have a housekeeper to do this for me but firstly, I don't like giving her extra work with my clothes I mean she already cleans, dries and folds them and I thank her with everything I've got for it. So clearly she has her hands full with the entire house and could do without breaking out the ironing board and preparing my shit. I can learn to do it myself granted, but I would rather not and just wear a suit. Much easier for everyone. Above I mentioned how the headpiece is to be ironed "depending on how the wearer would like it to look". Now with this I honestly have no preference because I really don't care. I just want to get it off me the moment it touches my skin. This, unfortunately, makes things worse for me because even when my housekeeper irons it, I don't know how to specify how to iron it because I don't care what it looks like. Also I don't know how to wear it properly so that it looks good and this of course makes things more difficult because when I am wearing a dishdasha my father gets mad yet again because I don't look smart. So it seems like a dead end either way. 

What I would like you people reading (thank you for reading by the way it really means a lot :)) to take away from this is basically to chill out a bit on dishdashas vs suits. Ok it may be preferable for everyone to wear a dishdasha but if any family has that one person that just prefers suits based on physical comfort then let the guy be. So long as he's not making trouble and his suit is appropriate for the occasion why should you make a big deal and rain on the parade? The way I think of it is this person invited ME to his wedding. He didn't invite a garment or anything he invited a human being who is ME. Now of course this does not mean I can go wearing whatever the fuck I want. No. It means I have to look good to not embarrass anyone attending, especially the bride and groom. This is done out of respect, not tradition. 

Over and fucking over again I am told "You are a Kuwaiti. You must wear a dishdasha. You can't wear a suit." Now this is understandable. Yes representing my country. Wearing the teams colors if you will. But then again I don't need a certain piece of clothing to be on me as a constant reminder of my nationality. I don't need people to know where I'm from and what I stand for because they're just people. They're not my family or my friends and therefore do not matter to me. If someone wants to ask where I'm from they are then more than welcome but if they JUST ask because of what I'm wearing that annoys me to be honest. It's like seeing someone writing with their left hand and asking if they're left handed. No cruel intention or anything just a facepalm moment. But if someone wants to ask where I'm from because they're genuinely interested then they are more than welcome. I don't like when someone is judged on appearance. What they look like or what they wear. It's actually aggravating to hear that some people may not talk to you or acknowledge your existence if you're unlucky enough to be wearing the wrong thing at the wrong occasion. We are not colors or ethnicities or even national clothing, we are people and that's what we should be judged by. Meet the person. Greet them. Have a conversation with them and then choose whether or not you would like to keep talking to them. I think that's a fairer way of dealing with differences. If I'm at a wedding in a suit, instead of coming up to me all heated and pissed yelling about why I'm wearing what I'm wearing why don't you come up to me and ask? If you're genuinely curious just ask the question. Whether or not you like the answer is your problem. I once read a phrase somewhere that made a lot of sense to me.

"It is not our differences that divide us. It is our inability to recognize, accept and celebrate those differences." -Audre Lorde

People always say that our faults, our impurities and our differences are what make us beautiful. I wish some people could open their minds just enough to store a second opinion.

In closing, ladies and gentlemen, today marks the first day of the Holy Month of Ramadan and to whoever is reading I would like to wish you a great month and best of luck with your prayers and fasting. Thank you :)

Show me a Sign

I'm sure a lot of people have seen movies where someone is shown "a sign from God" or "a sign from above" but recently I've been wondering if such a thing really exists. Are there really clues in Life that guide us to our destiny? Like who we should marry, where we should live and what we should work as? 
If someone THINKS they've seen a sign, a sign that's way too specific to be a mere coincidence should that person pursue it? For example a man lifts his head towards the sky, closes his eyes and says "Please show me a sign leading me towards the person I will spend the rest of my life with" after which he opens his eyes to find a blue butterfly has landed on his ring finger. Days, weeks, months pass after this and he spots a girl. A girl wearing a shirt that has a blue butterfly on it. Should this man take this phenomena as incentive to meet and get to know this person in the hopes that she is the One? 

As I think about it I admit I like the idea. Especially when it comes to love and finding your happily ever after because it's sweet. Finding your wife by following a blue butterfly. Finding something beautiful by following something beautiful. Also it will make a great story later on when friends ask how you and your wife met. 

But I believe that the existence of a sign depends on how much the individual wants it to be a sign. Like how much the individual doesn't want to mess up in reaching whatever they want so they frantically look for clues and hints to make sure they're still on the right path. But if signs don't exist, these people are just wasting energy looking for these signs. Maybe they may even stray from the good path because they think they saw a sign leading them somewhere else. 

In the end however, it all depends on what we believe in and how strongly we believe in it. If someone has a strong belief in signs then they WILL find what they are destined to find. Just remember you don't need to look for and follow signs that lead to your destiny because if you're destined to be someone or do something then it will happen eventually. 

Freedom

noun
the power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants without hindrance or restraint


Above is the definition of "Freedom" exactly how is it written in the dictionary. Now my question is "How do we know when (or if) we are really free?" 

I think, for the most part at least, freedom is an illusion to keep us in line. To avoid chaos. I'm sure all of you have seen the movie The Matrix which is a perfect example of what I mean. The Matrix was freedom but it was nothing more than a smoke screen keeping people in line to avoid rebellions against those who created the illusion. 

No one is genuinely free. We are all in a prison of some kind whether its  our jobs, our schools, our families or our country's laws. No one can do whatever the hell they want and expect to get away with it unless of course what they want to do is follow the rules with a passion.

I stumbled upon the picture below one day while searching Google images for something. It may not have exactly brightened up my day but one thing it thankfully did do was open my eyes.

I now accept the fact that I'm not free and to be honest, it makes me happier because at least I'm not lying to myself. I'd much rather have the ugly truth than a beautiful lie.

War is Hell

Alright I don't watch a lot of news so I don't really know what's going on in the world. The reason why is because it's just too damn depressing. Like I don't want to start or end my day watching a true story that happened a week ago of 15 people dying and 4 people with limbs blown off as a result of a strategically placed bomb. Regardless of my lack of knowledge in this field I do know one thing: War is stupid !!

War shouldn't be around anymore, it should be obsolete by now. People are waiting for the future, people making movies about the future -news flash- WE ARE IN THE FUTURE so let's start acting like it. What I don't get about war is that some dude, while looking at a big big map, goes "Hmm I think I'll enjoy spreading my nation unto these lands here. Gentlemen kill the inhabitants of this area so I may own the land they walk on." And he sends like a couple of million of his own military troops to the land to slaughter them. Like alright dude you want that land? Fine no problem but you're gonna have to score it yourself because it's not fair to send the men of your country on this mission while you sit in your comfy chair, in your air conditioned office, sipping on your favorite drink and watching your favorite show. People are being put through hell out there as per your order and you sit there empty of any and all compassion for your fellow man. In the end all you care about is if you win or lose. And if you lose you try again sending more husbands, more friends, more sons, more fathers into Slaughter City.


I understand why we have armies though, armies are good but only to defend ourselves in case of an attack. But war I believe was necessary in the past when people were less civilized. When you couldn't sit down, talk and negotiate. Also back then it was survival of the fittest. Fighting for land to expand the small handful of people living in a small town. Now however, war shouldn't even be in the dictionary. What breaks my heart is when I see men and women in military attire, going down on one knee to kiss their son or daughter goodbye in the airport before getting on the plane. It's not fair for the child or the parent and what if (God forbid) that's the last time this 4 year old child will see their mom or dad? What if Daddy won't be there at their graduation? What if Mommy won't be there to kiss it better when the child falls of their bike? These, I believe, are crucial moments in a child's life because it makes them realize what love is. How to care and love others. I mean they are the future aren't they? What kind of future are we looking at if the children of the present don't know how to care for and love one another?

What I think should happen is if this dude Captain Douchebag wants some piece of land he should play chess with the other leader. It's the war that can be played without any innocents dying. Without any family separations. Even playing Call of Fucking Duty will be better than sending real soldiers into war. Even paintball ! Play paintball and see who wins !! Anything that can save lives !

There are almost 7,000 languages in the world. We have been blessed with the gift of communication. Verbal communication gets the point across so effectively and the modern world provides us with the ability to connect with anyone who speaks one of these 7,000 languages. You can't negotiate with a firearm. Guns. Can't. Talk. It may be true that actions speak louder than words but actions get people killed so the saying is void when it comes to war.
Talk people. Stop the killing. And if wars end who knows? We may not even need armies for protection. We may not have the need for firearms or knives or any form of weapon and if we get rid of them too who knows? Levels of crime may plummet.

A father should die in the presence of his son's love and care. Not by a bullet, not by a car, but by means of a hospital bed.

What's App Rage

I love just simply having a conversation with a friend on What's App and I'm sure all if not most of you do too. Because of how much I enjoy conversations I've developed the skill of carrying a conversation and I call it a "skill" because it's getting harder and harder to find people who can actually fucking talk through texts so it might as well be a skill. I'm sure you know them, they're those people who's favorite things to say are "nm, k, lol and :)". These four message responses are what I call "Conversation Killers" and should not be used unless the person you're talking to is someone you HATE. Like fucking despise. Every time I send a paragraph message or a question that requires a bit of effort in response like "What's your opinion about blah blah blah?", each one word answer I get in response feels like a gap I have to jump like I'm playing Sonic for crying out loud.

It's so aggravating when you're TRYING to have a conversation because it shouldn't be hard unless one of the people is genuinely busy with something. In that case say "brb" and come back later whenever you can. That's another thing that ticks me off, when someone says "brb studying" or whatever the case may be and then just disappear..like ok what am I supposed to do now?? Realistically it's just rude. It makes the other person almost regret starting the conversation in the first place because it's almost like not only did they run face-first into a brick wall but someone painted a huge middle finger on it. Since I don't like when that happens to me I don't do it to others. I say "brb" and when I get the chance to respond I apologize that I couldn't talk. That's it. A simple "Sorry I couldn't talk earlier, did you need anything? You're alright? Good just making sure :)" It's just being polite because think of the person on the other side. He/she came to you looking for a conversation with their FRIEND. A person they consider a loved one. It's a dick move to skip them like that.

Another thing I don't like is when someone who NEVER talks to you on what's app or real life or anything comes to you ONLY when they want something. For example throughout a semester of college they don't even make you feel like their friend. You don't really mind because you have other friends right? So the semester continues and then you finally come to your exam period. That's when you become bestest friends with EVERYONE. Everyone comes to you and asks for cheat sheets or PowerPoints or other study materials. This is one of the few exceptions where the act of making you feel nonexistent until they want something is actually alright. I do it and I don't feel bad when I do because I'm looking to my acquaintances and classmates for classwork. Is there anything wrong with that? Maybe there is something wrong with it but it's not major. But someone who only comes to you when they're sad or angry and want to vent is just irritating because you're just there thinking "Is that all I am to you? A fucking punching bag?". And they don't even return the favor when you're in need of someone to talk to. When you come to them they either give you the "get over it" vibe or they don't even ask if you wanna talk about it. You throw hints like "Sorry I'm not as talkative as I usually am. I'm feeling kinda down". They reply with "Oh it's ok I understand. It happens to everyone". If I'm someone remotely important to you at least make me feel like that and ask if something's wrong so you can help me like how I helped you all those other times.

Visions of Hell

Envision a prison
In which you're damned to listen
To pain in its purest form
Like rain bleeding through a furious storm

You're damned to watch
Helpless on your knees
Eternally caught
Between endless echoing screams

You shut your eyes
To spare one sense
Before you rise
Embrace suspense

You realise
That you've been blessed
The gift residing inside of your chest
You open your door and hear no more cries
Our Visions of Hell have finally died

The Tortoise and the Hare

Personally I'm a smoker. I enjoy smoking and so I keep smoking with no intention of quitting any time soon. It's apparent that smoking is affecting me because I find myself unable to hold my breath for as long as I used to and I get winded after climbing just 3 flights of stairs. Smoking leads to death- This is something all of us know and death is something most of us don't want just yet. However sometimes I wonder what if death is a good thing? What if it's not as bad as we see it in movies and TV? What if it's some kind of escape? I mean without the gift of death, none of us would be granted the path to paradise right?

I look at the work I have to do for college: reports and reports, presentations and final exams. Ugh. I can't be fucked to do any of that shit. I look at the consequences of not doing my best here and now. Which would most likely be a crap job with mediocre pay, therefore a mediocre place to live in and essentially a "Miserably Ever After" because I chose to slack at the wrong time. The thought of that worries me quite a bit but then my mind drifts elsewhere and I think So What? So what if I live my life in a small one room apartment in a rough area of town? So what if I live in a multi-million dollar mansion sitting on acres upon acres of private land? So what if I can buy anything or nothing I want? In the end Death will collect us all right? 

The way I thought of it was like a videogame. When you press start you're born and live your life in this game almost like the Sims. You do as good or as bad as you want in this game and get appropriate rewards. One problem though: this game has no "Save" option. Once you die that's it all your progress is lost. 
So what I think is "What's the point of doing good here when you will be rewarded with paradise after passing away?". Of course that doesn't mean I'm a suicidal wreck, nor does it mean I support suicide, however the thought of suicide does intrigue me. The thought of self termination as a result of a miserable life or a pressure-filled workplace or simply a series of unfortunate events. 

Smoking, I believe, is a very very slow form of suicide because it takes a while to get to you. It's not like hanging yourself or jumping off a roof or pulling a trigger. I won't be surprised if someone out there's reason for smoking is that he/she wants to pass away but they don't want it to be quick. A choice between the Tortoise and the Hare. This person chose the Tortoise as opposed to other people who are just fed up with their lives and so choose the Hare method. Some smokers, regardless of how much you see them smile and laugh, may possibly be begging and longing for Death's touch so they may be shown the gates of the Afterlife. These people, who want death, will not hang or shoot themselves because their lives are not terrible. In fact they have running water, a roof over their heads, a fridge filled will food, money in their wallets and cars in their garages. Most likely they are more than thankful for all they have been blessed with but feel like something is missing. A desire so precious that they are willing to end their lives on this plane just so they may achieve their biggest wish in another plane i.e. paradise. Thus they see smoking as the perfect form of suicide for them because it paces the dying out amongst years they still have to be with their friends and family. When they take their first drag from their first cigarette they know they are going to die sooner and so try with their heart and soul to make the most of their lives on Earth so they may be rewarded for their selflessness later on.

A small piece I wrote about Death inspired me to write this post. This is that original piece:

A Beautiful Death

The Reaper's true intention- Salvation
Cursed with the gift of silence 
Blessed with the curse of guidance
He lightens the Gates of Judgment
We escape the Hate and Torment